I realize there are much more important issues going on in the world right now, but sometimes we all need a free pass, even if it’s just for a moment.
A couple of people informed me that the “cussing” I did in my last post was offensive.
(So, if you were offended, I apologize for saying the word “cuss…”)
(Sorry, one of the side effects of this new medicine is snark…)
(Not really, but I’m going to blame everything on side effects anyway, okay?)
Anyway, that got me wondering…
Do you cuss?
You can obviously leave your comment anonymously – I won’t tell anyone…but I thought it would be an interesting weekend conversation.
Comments
178 responses to “Do You Cuss?”
Hell yes. :)
you beat me to it. =)
And me (by a long shot). I think everyone thought this, so kudos to beating everyone to it.
-Marshall Jones Jr.
.-= bondChristian?s last blog ..Smooth broadcast: How (and why) to promote pointless talking =-.
some people just want to be offended… :-(
sadly there are two words that i struggle with all the time.
i have been thinking about what cussing is. there are words that are commonly accepted as cuss words but i have decided that it is about intent more than choice of word or use of initials.
there is no real way to avoid cussing in your heart and anyone who says that they never cuss is a liar.
I think it’s much more offensive to BE offended than it is to use the occasional “sentence enhancer.” (Thank you, South Park.) That said, tossing out an F-bomb every other word because you can’t formulate a complete sentence is just sad. Do I cuss? Sometimes. Do I try not to? Yes. But I also try not to speak evil about our nation’s leaders, or gossip about my neighbors, or threaten my kids to get them to obey… If we’re going to talk about sins of the mouth let’s start there!
.-= Niki?s last blog ..A bloody battle, indeed =-.
I do. It’s improved from what it used to be. But isn’t part of the Christian life daily be sanctified and transformed from your former self and that sanctification and transformation begins the day you get saved and only ends the moment you go to Heaven? So yes I do.
.-= Prudence?s last blog ..In Sickness =-.
You are right on here Prudence. Transformation rocks!
I have never heard either of my parents cuss. So I do not simply because I did not grow up around it.
As I kid I use to think you were unchristian if you said a cuss word. I use to think the same thing about drinking, but have learned a little since being 8.
My parents are not fundamentalist, they just do not cuss or drink (could be their up bringing—alcoholic father and verbally abusive mother). I think it is a culture thing.
It does get a little annoying though when people cuss just to cuss or every other word is a cuss word.
I tend to take the D Webb approach, cuss with meaning…you know what I mean?
.-= Kyle Reed?s last blog ..Top 10 Blogs of the Year =-.
I recall a few years ago a stink that was made because I think it was Bono said F— live on TV. The FCC ended up excusing it because of the context it was used in.
.-= Prudence?s last blog ..In Sickness =-.
Sometimes cuss words aren’t profane…
…but they could be profound. HA!
I’ve not been much of a cusser in my life until this year as I have been going through a divorce. pain brings it out of me i guess…
:-)
.-= Kevin Bradford?s last blog ..Work. =-.
Indeed, Anne, “cussing” (or, to use the more formal term, cursing) isn’t always profane. Yeah, it can be profound, or it can simply be literal. For example, I often tell Satan to “go to Hell” when he tries whispering ungodly things in my spiritual ear. I know too many preachers who ungracefully try to “scare the hell” out of folks, literally. John 3:18 says that those without Christ are damned. And, I must admit, Jeff Goldblum’s comment on the pile of triceratops dung just wouldn’t have been the same without the “s-word.”
Having said that, to answer the original question, yes, I’m infected by the world we live in. Yes, I’m offended by people using profanity as though it were their native tongue. Yes, I use it myself; for example, when I’m mad at myself, I rarely say that I’m a “screw-up,” if you get the drift. I’m NOT saying that’s good, nor am I justifying it in any way, shape, or form. I’m just Speaking Freely. ;)
Anything Bono does is excused….thats because he is the coolest guy alive.
Context is King
.-= Kyle Reed?s last blog ..Top 10 Blogs of the Year =-.
“Then again ? who decided ?those? words were ?cuss? words?” – asked Faye…
Excellent question. Cuss words are cultural. Some words we use everyday in America are quite vulgar in other cultures.
That said to point out, it is not the word.
I grew up with an alcoholic dad that used the ‘big’ cuss words all the time. Thus they were ingrained into my vocabulary. I use them often, not out of anger or hate, just as words, adjectives, verbs, what have you.
I lived with many years of shame from the ‘religious’ telling me how evil and bad I was to use such words. I tried with all my might to stop. it never worked.
When I finally realized how much God loves me (yes even *After* becoming a Christian), that He was in the business of restoring and healing my heart (not washing my mouth out with soap). I was able to let go of the shame, and the effort, and simply *rest* in Him doing what He does best. (If that makes sense to you.)
Do I still cuss? Yep. But God loves me and is still restoring and healing my heart!
.-= Rocco?s last blog ..Restore the places long devastated (part II) … =-.
sorry, not sure how my post ended up under your comment. it was supposed to go under the main blog.
:)
.-= Rocco?s last blog ..Restore the places long devastated (part II) … =-.
I do all the time. It’s a good release so the pressure doesn’t build up. I mostly swear in the car.
hahaha! SAME HERE!! Good times in a car. . .
Yep. I do from time to time. Not usually the “big” ones, kinda sounds like sin… I only do the “little” ones.
Then again — who decided “those” words were “cuss” words?
For the record, I needed your last post. I don’t have all the body fat measurements, only my now three sizes smaller jeans. Since I’ve started working out, my weight hasn’t moved. I’m supposing, since I haven’t been eating more, that it’s because I’m ridding my body of the fat and strengthening the muscle. Thanks for the confirmation and reminder!
.-= Faye?s last blog ..Silent Hallelujahs =-.
I heard that cussing actually helps relieve pain when you like, stub your toe or something.
I grew up with the word “butt” being a cuss word…but I admit…I’ve gotten a little more relaxed in my speech lately.
A recent study does show that cussing can help relieve pain:
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=why-do-we-swear
:]
I think more research needs to be done before we’ve got a solid case for proving cussing really is a painkiller, but hey, I was happy to see these results!
That scientific report set me free.
Now I’m a cuss-lovin’ fool.
Except when my mother is around.
Or my kids.
Or church people.
So I guess I’m a closet cusser.
Do I cuss? #$&$@ no.
The word “cuss” offended folks? Wow. “Son of a nutcracker!”
Swearing may be one of my top issues. It is usually done in anger and in secret. My recent blog about this issue:
http://emilykira.wordpress.com/2009/11/13/almost-swearing/
I am trying to break my habit of cussing. Mainly just because people get wrong ideas. I don’t cuss bad, like those bad “double-jointed” words. Just like the “S” word and stuff like it.
I do. We had a discussion on another blog once about whether or not cursing (sorry, I can’t get into the whole southern ‘cuss’ thing) was a sin and quoting verses about allowing all things “clean” to come out of your mouth.
Is there a time and a place for it? I probably cannot repeat the string of obscenities that leave my mouth if I hit my toe or knee against something really hard. If I get scared or something really surprises me, it’s not uncommon for an “Oh s__t!” to fly. Or if I see something that immediately causes anger, “WTF?!” is often what is said. Does any of that make it right? Probably not, but I don’t lose sleep over it.
At the same time, I often hear people using f-bombs and whatever else during casual, everyday conversation and to be honest, that just sounds ugly.
I tend every now and then to occasionally dropped a word every so often. Sometimes to be completely honest I dont feel guilty when I cuss. Sometimes it brings me great release and joy to let off some steam; and to be completely honest I the s-word…
.-= Jay Melilli?s last blog ..Verge of Tears [bella errore]. =-.
Me and my wife were just having this discussion the other day. I say “freakin’” a lot, sometimes in jest, and sometimes as my natural emotional reaction to things (like when I’m upset or complaining). And it got us thinking, if you use a substitute word, like “fudge”, in the same contexts and with the same attitude as you would the ‘cuss’ word you’re replacing, isn’t that just the same thing as the ‘cussing’ itself?
I know a pastor who would say that we’re worried about ‘behaviors’ here when we’re nitpicking about exactly what words are what, instead of the ‘attitudes’ behind it. (someone earlier mentioned motivations.) And I think I agree with that. So that took a long time to say yes, I think I do cuss.
I try not to. For me, it’s a sign that I am not in control of my emotions/thoughts/actions. It’s an indicator that I need to step back and take a deep breath. Most of the time, if a swear word is the best thing I can muster up, I probably shouldn’t be saying anything at all. I’m not always successful, but I’ve made good progress in this area.
.-= Elaine?s last blog ..Santa 2009 =-.
I make an effort to let my life sing for Him, in my thoughts, actions, and yes, words…. and yes, sometimes I fall very short of what He wants for my life. The more consciously aware I become of my thoughts, actions, and words, the less I struggle. It’s a work in progress, getting progressively better.
Thank God we serve a God of mercy and grace. In abundance. :o)
I agree. I truly desire my words to be glorifying and edifying. Obviously, I fall short at times and am thankful for God’s grace.
I’m not a fan of cussing though and don’t want my 1 year old son hearing cuss words and repeating them (that really scares me).
First, people really to get a life. Second, I do on occasion. My wife is a little more “relaxed in her speech” than I am.
Here is my deal:
Too many churchy people major in the minors. We define the Christian life by things far to small and minute. We focus in on cussing, smoking, drinking, tithing, etc, when Jesus spoke of focusing in on major issues of faith, justice, and mercy.
With that said, to be a growing and honest follower of Jesus, we at some will develop a “theology of language” if you will. And the Bible teaching are much more focused on HOW we use language, than on the language we use.
In other words, I am bothered much more by the “Christian” blogger who uses every word he types to tear down other people than I am with the one who drops an f-bomb when he stubs his/her toe. (or looks at the scale?!?) How we use language ultimately is going to be determined by how we can use it for good in the relationships we have.
Dang. I just wrote a blog post for a comment. Hate it when that happens.
.-= @billy_johnson?s last blog ..Haiti and YOU =-.
how’d ya like me having a huge comment and not answering the question?…. not often, but occasionally. there.
.-= @billy_johnson?s last blog ..Haiti and YOU =-.
I have tried to stop cussing, and I think I have done a good job, especially around my 4 year-old daughter. I have to admit, though, I occasionally still let one slip when I am driving. Driving seems to bring out the worst in people, and I guess I am no exception.
H’mmm. A poser. Yes, cuss words still slip out occasionally, even tho the Bible tells us to guard our tongues, and to speak gently….
I used to cuss like a sailor (sorry to those of you in the Navy; my dad & spouse were Navy and it’s JUST an expression).
When I became a Christian in 1994, I cleaned up my mouth immediately. Now, under extreme pressure/pain/anger, yes, they still slip out; so obviously I’ve got some “Walk-working” to do.
I remember letting a cuss word slip in high school during a verbal fight with my Dad. He actually asked me “Where the f*** did I learn to talk like that?” And I hadn’t even SAID what HE said!!! I remember he stunned me into speechlessness, before responding, “DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF?” I remember being grounded for about a week, so whatever we’d been arguing about, I didn’t win. Laugh about it to this day. :) Oh the lessons.
Thanks Anne, for ALWAYS asking the questions that keep us on our toes.
Amy
I grew up cussing like a sailor before Christ. One day while at work as a new Christian a woman came up to me and said “Ohh your the cussing one”. Previously she heard me say “damn”. Those words ran through my bones like a chill. It hurt that this non-Christian was able to define me as the “cussing” one. I also noticed that my language was offensive to some. Because of this offense even though most of our “cuss” words are cultural I have tamed my tongue not to cuss.
Hells yeah, I cuss.
Well, I’m a youth minister, and a nanny, so I don’t cuss around my kids.
But, I definitely cuss occasionally out of anger/frustration, in social situations, and around my family. I mean, it’s not something that comes out in every sentence, or even every day, but it’s also not something I’m really worried about. It’s not really a big deal in my house.
Also, I call it cursing.
.-= Amanda Mae?s last blog ..Post and Read via Twitter API =-.
yup, but only around those that I know won’t be offended.
Yes…I do…I am way better at it than I used to be when I cussed like a sailor in HS. But you know…I appreciate you being so real. WE need people like you!
I think if you offend them on your blog…they need to remember…it’s your blog…they don’t have to read it…:) YOu are free to express your thoughts!
Just sayin…:)
.-= Steph?s last blog ..Lauren’s test results….To parties! =-.
I don’t cuss in ordinary conversation, but it does creep in when I get angry or frustrated.
This issue has been a source of contention between me and my husband for our entire relationship, because his language is horrible. I don’t find it unChristian, necessarily, but it is definitely crude and rude. I hate to admit it, but he is a pastor, and he would never talk this way around his congregation, and only to a small extent with other people, but he lets it all out at home, though he knows how much it grates on me. Our baby will be picking things up sooner than he realizes, so I hope he can clean it up soon!!
“Poke your eyeball” “finger in the door” pain, Cancer, Child Abuse, Self-Righteous Holy Roler’s, Prejudice of any kind. Yes. I drop bad words at times.
Jesus was a carpenter-I wonder what he said when he hit his finger w/ the hammer?… Wait, He’s Jesus, I guess He wouldn’t hit himself to begin with. :-)
xo
.-= Reese?s last blog ..Favorite Day, Ever #1 =-.
Anne,
You sure know how to stir up some GREAT dialog! :)
Keep it up.
I cuss only very rarely, and I usually do it only around particular friends.
I only started cussing more — and by “more” I mean “at all” — this past year. I went through a fairly deep depression, and part of my coming out of it included realizing how much I have spent my whole life trying to earn God’s favor by being good, and how much that just doesn’t work. Quite frankly, throwing out a cuss word here and there while I’m praying, or while I’m talking with a close friend, is, for me, one of the only ways I have found that accurately express the degree of anger and disappointment I’ve harbored against God. For so long I’ve thought God didn’t want to deal with my anger and disappointment. But once I started to deal with that — thanks to some very trying times, some faithful friends, and a good dose of Philip Yancey — I realized God really DOES want me to express my deepest resentments to Him — because that’s part of being in relationship with Him.
Sometimes the more couth words in my vocabulary just don’t get at what I’m feeling. Do I want to maintain toward God a posture of reverence? Absolutely. But I want equally not to distance myself from God by assuming I need to earn His acceptance by being good.
Awesome! Well said, thanks for sharing!
.-= Rocco?s last blog ..Oh Bugger! =-.
Yes, I picked it up senior year at Christian college. It was a joke, but now it works when I am mad too. I do try and tame it often as I am a youth leader.
Sometimes (like once a year) I say… cr@p. But only for the shock value it has on my husband. ;)
I don’t swear. Something about it just doesn’t sit right with me.
I think a well timed cuss word used in a specific context by specific people can be GLORIOUS though. :)
It’s the cuss all the time in every situation cussing that I don’t like.
And I believe that CONTEXT is KING. Couldn’t agree more. :)
.-= Michelle Sidles?s last blog ..My Favorite Christmas Album =-.
I used to have a horrible potty mouth when I was a teenager. So needless to say I do my very best not to because I am still working on my language. But I do think that sometimes..in the correct context and situation..a cuss word can get people’s attention. We should never throw out unedifying words just to say them. Because then they are just that…unedifying. Your post did not offend me one bit…I think that is kind of silly to get offended by the word “cuss”. And I forget what commenter said it but the line “Son of a Nutcracker” made my day.
.-= Tiffany?s last blog ..A Cord of Three Strands =-.
I have a daughter who will be 5 next month, so I do my best not to cuss. That said, there are some situations that the F-word just feels appropriate. And in those times…I use it.
funny you should ask this today. ;) our student ministry staff just got in trouble this week by the senior pastor (who was very gracious & kind) about the language we use in the office behind closed doors. something about calling each other “douche” and our conversation about the movie “Step Brothers” … the walls are definitely thinner than we thought! ;)
.-= Brandi?s last blog ..story tellin? =-.
I have a hard time believing that certain combinations of syllables are inherently evil. It’s superstitious at best. I’ve never understood why the meaning of what someone is saying is rarely considered. Most people are way more offended by “I f***ing love that dude” than “I hate that guy”. That’s backwards.
If you feel bad about using certain words, then you have a Biblical mandate to not use them. Don’t violate your conscience, whether what you feel bad about is specifically mentioned in Scripture or not.
I’m very careful about who I say certain words around, because it’s not exactly Christ-like to stir trouble for no reason. Now, if you’re stirring trouble for a reason, well that’s a very different story.
.-= Jeremy?s last blog ..Jesus and Free Dogs =-.
Jeremy, it’s not just backwards… it’s ass backwards!
;-)
.-= Todd Ruth?s last blog ..Help me become Martha Stewart and/or Gordon Ramsay! =-.
I rarely swear but I also rarely notice when someone around me does. I think people today are so easily offended – and now that I mentioned it I think I’m offended that people are offended.
I rarely cussed until college (hung out with some serious potty mouths), I had a period of time where it was worse than I was comfortable with. But I do believe that context matters greatly and that sometimes, those are the only words that can express the depth of your feelings.
My caveat with that is I cannot stand when someone cusses around children, no matter context, etc. I can’t count how many times I’ve been at a grocery store in line and overheard a conversation using strong cuss words (f bomb), and there are children easily within earshot. It is very hard for me not to ask them to watch their language around children. Does anyone else have that happen?
.-= V. Higgins?s last blog ..Slowly creating new language in my heart… =-.
YES!
oh… i’m not supposed to be that excited, am i?
I like to swear.
I really began to enjoy it at my fundamentalist bible college, and then kinda got really used to it. I’m really good about “turning it off” around kids and whatnot, but when i’m around someone older who needs to be brought out of his world a little, or even who i can feel safe around– i let er rip.
My favorite is “shit!”
Also, there’s a whole slew of spanish words i swear with (as a very young child, i didn’t think God cared about those, cause they weren’t in English…)
In normal every day speech I don’t.
But there are times when, like everyone else, I’ve stubbed my toe or something’s scared me.
.-= Tom?s last blog ..My Week In Five Steps =-.
I grew up in a Christian family where even “dang” and “shoot” were considered borderline. But I remember my first year in public school–fifth grade–and hearing all these new curse words. I excused myself to the restroom one day and actually practiced saying these words in front of the mirror. I didn’t like how they sounded so I stopped.
Now that I’m many years removed from fifth grade, I’ve relaxed my standards a little bit. When I’m alone, I’ll sometimes let a four-letter word slip, but I’ve even been feeling convicted about that lately.
If I wanted to, I could defend the occasional swear, but then I have to ask myself, why am I defending this? As a Christian, there is value in being different.
i was raised by parents that were both the “good” children of their families. i was a PK, DK, MK and there was no “cussing” in our house. when we got older, my parents cursed from time to time to show the extent of their emotion on different things encountered. then cuss words were said in jest and would always get a little giggle… like ooh, we’re being so “bad”. now i just cuss when i need to and for dramatic effect. plus my boyfriend gets a kick out of it when i throw down a strong word or two out of the blue… it does wonders to tarnish my squeaky clean church girl image. i don’t believe cussing is an issue that needs to be addressed in the Church. by the way, you know what words i don’t use?… stupid, dumb, worthless, & idiot in regards to people. because those aren’t very Christian-like words. hahaha;-)
.-= JuliaKate?s last blog ..On why I love the Church… =-.
I went back and read the alleged “cussing” post. Anyone who criticized that needs to get a life. What you said was mild and not offensive in any way. Sheesh. What is wrong with people? Those are people you don’t need as readers–but obviously they need you.
Amen!
.-= Rocco?s last blog ..Oh Bugger! =-.
I grew up with a mother who allowed me to say whatever I wanted as long as I watched my mouth at school and in front of my grandmothers. Let me be clear…I was allowed to cuss but NOT cuss AT someone. There is a line there that is kind of like porn…hard to define but you know it when you see it. There were two words I was not allowed to say and I don’t use either to this day. (and neither, interestingly enough, is considered to be a “cuss” word by most people I know)
I am a part of the leadership team at my church (I grew up unchurched) and I still let fly on occasion. I don’t want to offend others so I try very hard to take the company I am in under consideration when choosing words. My pastor will occasionally call me out from the pulpit about it…he seems to find me entertaining. Our church reaches out to those who don’t “do church” for assorted reasons. To me, it is about not pretending I am perfect and being OK with others seeing that.
The first thought that came into my head as I was reading that people took offense that you used the word “cuss” was, “Are you f—ing kidding me?” Now I thought it, I didn’t say it, but that is as far as I have gotten in the sanctification process, gaining the ability to keep the lips closed (most of the time).
.-= Mike Raburn?s last blog ..Pray like you?re turning on the TV =-.
Fact is, got converted at age 26 in a jail cell; did first few years of new life (easiest years, by the way) in prison. No excuses, but yes, words still escape my mouth; but by His grace some get captured before release! But one man’s cuss word may be anothers no big deal word. Methinks “you idiot” is worse that *XYST
You know what has popped into my head recently when I’ve been in a cuss-worth situation?
“Oh, Expletive. Oh, Expletive.”
In big red letters in my head, just like it was in your blog post about the taxi driver.
I think actually saying “cuss” or “expletive” instead of the actual words is hilarious.
.-= Becky Miller?s last blog ..miller_schloss: @aaronck Like your Magnolitas painting. How’re things going with the in-laws? =-.
Thanks! I try :)
Yes, I do.
.-= michaeldanner?s last blog ..Good for you, Sarah Palin =-.
I replied to you yesterday about losing two followers on Twitter because I RT your post that had the word cuss in it. Whether that is the actually case or not I am not sure. I just want to make sure that you knew I was saying so light heartedly. :-)
To admit that one cusses is not offensive. To hear somebody cuss all the time is annoying. When I do cuss it is out of extreme frustration. I don’t feel proud about it one bit.
I come from a family of cussers. I don’t want to say it is ingrained in me but I kind of think it is. I try not to do it but it is at times really difficult.
Damn straight, I do!
.-= Eric?s last blog ..Sermon: Blessed =-.
Yes. Like a sailor. But it is typically when I am mad or sad.
I do indeed “cuss” but here’s the way I understand it… I have actually been working through this topic for a while now. I definitely don’t feel as though this is the final conclusion, but this is just where I am at currently.
First of all, words are simply words. Their meaning comes from the person who says them. “Words don’t have meaning; people have meaning with their words.” So if this is the case, saying Sh$* out of frustration and saying dang, poop, crap etc. is the same thing. Words that we consider “cuss” words are only that way because people used them in such a manner. It is quite obvious that certain words don’t hold as much meaning now as they did even in the last decade… in other words, cussing isn’t considered a “bad” thing in a lot of circles.
Secondly, since people mean with their words, there is a more important question to consider: “how am I using said words?” The bible makes it pretty clear that all things should be done in love. That was definitely the “big idea” coming out of Paul’s writings. So, with love being the goal, imo any words spoken to another person without love are bad. I can walk around saying Sh*# all day to myself and it not be a big deal…and probably not a sin. But at any point if I turn to someone and tell them “you’re a idiot”, I’ve acted out of hatred, and not love…and probably sinned.
Now of course, as many of you have mentioned, we must be very careful of when to use “cuss” words because not everyone has the same understanding or view and we do not want to offend or cause anyone to stumble. I think this is important because we need to always be acting out of selflessness…and if that means holding one’s tongue while in a certain environment or around certain people, then so be it.
There is a lot more that could be said, but I was already getting long. Hope this makes sense…
I don’t cuss. That’s not to say I’ve never in my life said a cuss word but that set of words isn’t part of my everyday speech. Growing up my mother never cussed and she always told me not to cuss. The past few years I’ve actually heard her say an occasional cuss word in conversation and it really freaks me out! It just sounds funny and strange coming out of her. I don’t get offended by cussing (well there are a few words I don’t like to hear) and I certainly wasn’t offended by your post, that’s just silly. We Christians spend too much time being offended and getting our panties in a wad, we seriously need to chill out a bit.
You said…PANTIES!
*stifles immature giggle*
.-= Jeff?s last blog ..How to make friends and be influenced by the right people =-.
Depends on the company…this also goes along with my jokes.
With my churchy friends I’m an angel: I reduce my cussin’ to fudge, darn, and shoot.
With my beer guzzlin’ Friday-after-work-Happy-Hour crew…different story.
I don’t know why the phrase “Getting our panties in a wad” always crack me up.
Kay Warren said at a conference I was at once “get your knickers in a knot” :) I think she wanted to say the other thing though… :)
That sounds painful!!
I probably would if I knew how. Everytime I try I just end up sounding stupid (and I need NO help in that department!). I usually just leave it to my 21 year old. She’s very creative. We do have boundries though. I draw the line at the F-bomb and no direct name calling. Some people are so gifted they can make anything sound like they are cussing even when they aren’t.
BTW I was not offended but according to @tferriss (via @lnobles) post today, you must be doing something right if you’re pissing people off! http://bit.ly/5pRzie
Way to go!!!
.-= Cindy Graves?s last blog ..The End of the World, As We Know It? =-.
I can’t say that I never have cussed…but I haven’t for years nor do I have the desire to. I try to keep my heart and head clean, but I am not perfect. I think that every person has their own vices in which the devil uses to drag us down. I never wanted my kids to use offensive language (cuss words or hurtful words because both can be offensive) and have tried hard to set the example before them. I am one of those people who happens to be offended by cuss words. Kind of the the garbage in equals garbage out kind of thing. If I have to stay in the situation where the language keeps going on, I politely ask them if they could please choose other words. Most of the time, I just try to remove myself and whisper a prayer. It moves my mind on to better things.
Just my opinion.
WTF? I love it that people were offended over the word, “cuss”. Typical religious people! And yes i do “cuss” on occasion.
PS. i’d love to see you woop on a female King Kong! : )
just being real here…i cuss A LOT!! please don’t tell my mother.
I think the idea has been summed up well. It’s an attitude thing. So, yes, I do, from time to time, some times being more frequent, some times being less frequent cuss.
But, I would offer that cussing like anything else in the Christian life is tricky. One doesn’t want to completely dismiss an action because we as humans will find another way to manifest the attitude that was behind it. Similarly, though, you can’t completely ignore action because, well, it’s easy to make excuses.
I think cussing is one of those things that most of the time fall into a fairly neutral category. It’s not neccesarily bad for you, but it’s not necessarily good for you either. So, if anything, it does require of us an examination from time to time. I have had to occasionaly say, “Man, I’ve been cussing a lot lately, is there something else going on?”
So, a little balance, a little paying attention, and quite frankly, a little cussing is probably just all right.
Sometimes. Mostly in traffic. Or fights with my husband. And I KNOW that is TERRIBLE! (I’m referring mostly to the husband part here.) It always makes me feel ROTTEN, and I know it’s so rude. But . . . I’m freaking human, you know?
Just kidding on that “freaking” thing there. :)
Interesting that you bring this up today, by the way. I read an article about profanity in the workplace yesterday. The author’s opinion was DON’T. Just more food for thought…
Wow. It took rereading the post twice before I realized there wasn’t any “cuss” words in the post – just the word “cuss.” I have been known to utter an expletive from time to time. I try to avoid it in most situations and use them sparingly to make the effect more pronounced. Sometimes the most dire situations can be lightened with a well placed word. My words of choice are merely socially “unacceptable” never of a religious nature (if you know what I mean). I also avoid using them in situations where it would make the listener uncomfortable as per my interpretation of Romans 14. That being said, if you are writing a blog for general consumption, I don’t see how you can avoid upsetting someone.
I cuss in my head but very rarely out loud. I’m too much of a “proper” personality, plus I feel like I’d shame my parents (who live 2400 miles away) by doing so. They weren’t religious freaks by any means–but swearing was not in our family culture. I’m not offended by cuss words but try my best not to offend. I don’t feel that swearing just to be cool is going to gain me any points. I’m too far from “cool” for that to work. :)
What’s interesting to me is how much more swearing (and drinking) there is on the West Coast versus the Midwest or the South. It shouldn’t surprise me, but it does. It isn’t unusual to go to a small group here in Portland and have wine/beer on the menu and to hear a couple of cuss-bombs in the conversation. What would be scandalous to others is really quite normal for here. That’s fascinating to me.
.-= Stretch Mark Mama?s last blog ..Soft Ginger Cookies =-.
Also forgot to say (I’m long-winded AND talk to myself…)
I’ve got three kids, which keeps my language on the squeaky-clean side. I always think “How would this word sound coming out of an 8 / 5 / 3YO mouth?” That usually tells me where to draw the line. :)
.-= Stretch Mark Mama?s last blog ..Soft Ginger Cookies =-.
Your family pic on your blog is Awesome! I love the look on the little man on the left!
.-= Rocco?s last blog ..Oh Bugger! =-.
Sounds like my amazing small group…here in the middle of a midwest cornfield! I’ve always thought I belonged in Portland…
I once had a one on one with a student of mine and he mentioned that he had been journaling his prayers that week and almost wrote a cuss word down but didn’t.
I interrupted him and asked him, “WHY? Why did you not?”
As if God doesn’t know our deepest thoughts and imaginations but only what we actually write on paper or say aloud.
—————–
To answer your question: Yes
Very good point!
(So, if you were offended, I apologize for saying the word ?cuss??)
That sentence struck me SO funny.
I wasn’t even allowed to say “GEE” growing up, so I still giggle like crazy when I hear cuss words, but don’t really use them. I enjoy saying things that SOUND like cuss words, but aren’t technically. You know, seeing how much I can get away with. Just seems like one of those silly churchy things to do.
“We don’t SAY ‘crap’, we say ‘crack’…” etc.
:)
I cuss. I cuss. I cuss. I have two boys a little over a year apart. I cuss. A lot. Mostly under my breath of when I don’t think they can hear. But when Sam said “damn” when his tinker toy creation fell over I realized perhaps I cuss too much. The fbomb flies only when I have completely lost all sense of parental and marital control. So yes, I cuss.
I’m not much of a cusser…and I’m not really offended by it. But something I was thinking about recently is why we tend to replace cuss words with different words that express the same sentiment. From the Lords perspective, is it the word that is a cuss or the sentiment in our words? If so, frick is just the same as….
As “cuss!” :)
I read half the comments, and I didn’t see anything similar to this, so I am just going to say it. Cussing as some kind of “sin” is highly problematic for a number of reasons.
The idea of cussing stems historically from vulgarity. The root word “vulgar” means to “make common.” In other words, vulgarity was the common language of the people as opposed to nobility, royalty, or upper class. You can see the etymology of the word here:
http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=vulgar
Cuss words are, as the sentence implies, just words. As an exercise, say the word “duck” over and over again. After a while, one begins to see that it just sounds. The only importance is the meaning behind that sound. And what has become the meaning of such cuss words? It has come to be associated with criminals, hoodlums, and delinquents. Cussing has taken on a form of cultural deviancy (which is also why it might be so popular among deviant adolescents).
To understand it form an historical perspective, the term vulgar in the victorian usage mean that you were “making something common.” The nobility, in other words, thought themselves too “good” to use such words, and thus, effectively create a barrier between themselves and the lower classes (this is how they wanted it ).
The question, of course, is do we, as contemporary Christians, want this barrier between us and “them” (whoever the “they” may be today)? Am I advocating cussing to fit in with that group of people? Not necessarily. Am I asking your readers to think twice before condemning it, and unnecessarily building walls between the “Christian” and the “other.”
Awesome Danny!!
I use real cuss words when I’m really frustrated or get hurt but not in front of other people. I do use the fake cuss, “friggin”, WAY too much and really try not to! It’s a hard habit to break!!
Usually in my head when my 9 year old is around. Driving by myself then it’s out loud. But I did let one slip in front of her today while trying to assemble a gingerbread house.
Sadly the bully in her class cusses every day – so she’s familiar with the words. But she also knows better than to use any of them.
.-= Michelle?s last blog ..No one is perfect =-.
Trying really hard to not use the F word. It just sounds bad when other hear it, and I believe my mom. “You show that you have little command of the english language when you use those words.”
yes i do…i feel like if i try to replace a cuss word with something different like “shoot” or “dang it”, God still knows what i’m thinking and feeling in my heart.
I’m all over the scale with this topic. I’ve been in all “grades” of swearing. From potty mouth to clean mouth. One trick I did for a while was to say “cuss” everytime I wanted to cuss. In this season of life which has been HIGH stress, the bad words come more freely. However my (self deluding maybe?)justification is that I refuse to say gd. Also, I try not to allow any OMG either. Its oh my “gosh”. So I teeter with legalism over using His name. My newest conviction is that ANY TIME I hear someone say gd on tv, movies, in public, etc. I say out loud, NO matter where I am at “BLESS THE LORD”. Does He receive that blessing from me in leiu of their cursing of Him? Does He receive it from me even if 20 min. earlier I had just uttered a different cuss word? Are there d-e-g-r-e-e-s of cussing?
My greatest challenge is to quit using A LOT of words, even the non-profane ones :) :) da*n little foxes
I was raised by a mom who could and still can out-cuss any sailor. Even my sweet country, God lovin Grandma used to say SH#@ fire all the time. SO, I don’t get offended at all my cuss words.
I say crap on my blog and for that I don’t get placed on some church blog rolls, I’m ok with it though, cuz’ I’m just not willing to give that word up.
I don’t cuss though…’cept sometime, occasionally, rarely really :-)
.-= Carole Turner?s last blog ..My Christmas wishes to you all.. =-.
I try not to, but it comes out every once in a while when I’m pissed.
I get that it’s technically a sin but I get annoyed when people get uptight and offended by other people cussing.
.-= Reggie?s last blog ..How Marriage Should Sound =-.
When I’m mad…even in front of my mom (although she rolls her eyes and says kimberly!)
.-= Kimberly?s last blog ..I Forget =-.
Hell is a cuss word? huh. I didn’t realise that.
I use the ‘f’ word a lot. I don’t like that I do, and I’m trying to stop, but years of being surrounding in a culture where it’s pretty much used as every second word in a sentence, it’s difficult when I get angry or frustrated.
Like last night when I was trying to wrap christmas presents and the sellotape and wrapping paper rolls were out to get me. There was much cursing and ‘effing’ as I tried to tame them…
I’m not an easily offended person. Easily offended people offend me. I’m sure there’s some irony in that ;-)
.-= brunettekoala?s last blog ..No words needed? =-.
Things I’ve learned from blogging & Twitter #132 : the definition of cuss words in the US is often very very different to much of the rest of the world :)
I grew up in a non-swearing environment at home…there was just none of it at all, and even things like “darn it” were not said…purely because my parents always encouraged us to find words that meant what we were trying to say, rather than resorting to swearing.
It still grates on me when I hear it, but I’m never offended by it. Being offended is such a waste of time.
.-= David?s last blog ..Taliban warns : "Australian must assimilate or perish" =-.
No, I don’t. And yes, I do find it offensive.
I used to cuss a lot growing up. It was something that I had to battle with a lot when I started to follow Christ at 16.
Nowadays, I think when you’re using cuss words as filler with no meaning, it’s just sounds unintelligent and immature. But I can see some situations where a cuss word might be powerful and needed.
There are a few that just rub me the wrong way though. I don’t the C word at all. EVER.
.-= Vin Thomas?s last blog ..Simple Steps to Secure Your WordPress Site =-.
Cussing is my form of anger management. Sometimes I use it…more often than not, no, but when I do, its for a reason.
hmmm…if i’m mad. used to alot more when i was younger. the question that comes to my mind though, is this: Do folks know the origin of some of these words, and if they did, would they still get their panties in a twist over them? Like s.h.!.t. for example is actually short for (s)hip (h)igh (i)n (t)ransit. You know why? Cause back in the day, manure used to be transported (for fertilizing purposes)by ship in the cargo area and when the methane gases would release and rise, it would become flammable and cause explosions. So to my mind, whats so vulgar ’bout that? People need to find other things to fuss about or spend more time loving people and less time picking other people apart.
oh, and btw, jackass is my cussword of choice. it is an animal and i’m sure somehow its biblical:).
.-= Pamela Hunter?s last blog ..Life Changes =-.
Weird… I didn’t even notice that you cussed in your last post. Yes… I cuss… A lot.
Sorry.
sometimes curse words form in my mind (especially in traffic) but if i don’t let them come out of my mouth is it still cussing?
I used to never cuss until I got the job I have now. When high stress moments come up I find myself cussing when nobody is around. I volunteer with middle school boys and I think a cuss word slipped out at Summer camp this past year. :(
I guess I’m glad people feel safe enough on your site to tell you they felt uncomfortable about your “cussing” in the last post, but at the same time, I think we place an unfair stigma on it. I really didn’t notice it in your last post. But I think even more importantly that the words we use is the intention we use them with. I think that makes a big difference.
All that being said, yeah, I cuss. A lot more than I need to.
.-= Jeremy?s last blog ..To Write Love on Her Arms =-.
I guess there are many things I do that I am not proud of. I don’t know if that is an answer or not, but it was what I felt when I read your question.
.-= 6YearMed?s last blog ..Foot and Mouth Disease =-.
I have to confess: if something startles me / scares the wits out of me, I will drop the “S Bomb” – purely unintentional and a remnant of my former life. Of course, there was the other night when I stepped out of the car and into a slush puddle of icy water up to my ankles and I chose to say “frick” in the midst of my frustration, instead of dropping a heavier bomb. So, I guess I still have some issues in this area.
.-= Jenn Calling Home?s last blog ..The Birthday Note =-.
Yeah, I do…and what makes me crazy about that fact isn’t that I do it, it’s that I know my heart behind the words as I am saying/screaming/crying them and those are the things I know aren’t glorifying my God.
Sigh.
I rarely, if ever, cuss around people…a few softball friends hear a little bit…however, I find myself saying a few things when I am in prayer…maybe a little frustration coming out.
I used to cuss pretty reguarly but was usually careful of my surroundings (not cussing in front of kids, etc). I did not grow up “churched,” really, but since coming into a deeper relationship with Christ and becoming a dad… I’ve toned done the choice of words quite a bit. Not because I think you’re not a Christian if you cuss but it’s a perspective thing… a respect thing… an example thing. Sometimes our words and our actions can be a slippery slope… we let small things become OKAY and then we are “sometimes” opening the door to other things. My choice of words sends a message to others, it sends a message to me (even as subtle as it may be but my words reinforce who I am and my outlook / perspective) so I choose to watch my tounge and be careful of what comes out of it. Very rarely will I cuss now but when I do it’s usually in the right context AND in the right company. I’ve just found, like most things in life, it’s a choice.
I have been working on that weakness for years. We had a “buck” jar when my son was young and anyone who used a bad word had to put a buck in it. But I totally agree with others who have said that it’s not the actual word that is said but the attitude behind it…
I am incredulous at the legalism some people worship instead of seeing the encouragement that your post shared!
I personally appreciate your honesty & transparency in your walk!
I admit, I did not read all 111 comments, so I apologize if someone else already posted this, but I read once that “Profanity is the result of someone with a limited vocabulary attempting to express themselves forcefully.” And yes, my vocabulary is somewhat limited from time to time.
in a word: no. are there times when i want to? uhhh…yes. :)
Great Dialog here Anne. I didn’t see anything in your last post that was offensive, not sure what people chose to be offended by. I for one needed that post. I still can’t believe I found your blog thinking you were a garden blogger like me and liked what I read so much that I’ve hung around. You are real, relavent, and heart felt.
As for cussing, yes I do but not like I used to. Back in the 80’s I got my first real job as the token female on an all male work crew (thank you equal opportunity). The hiring mgr told me he had to hire a woman and he wasn’t happy about it. no pressure. The guys taught me how to drink, smoke, and swear. My husband has spent the last 20 years trying to unteach me all of those things.
I have a few pet words that I’m trying to lose. Nothing vulgar or really big. Although yes, stubbing your little toe qualifies for use of certain words. ;-D
Great post.
.-= Deana OHara?s last blog ..My First Hate Letter =-.
Yup…but for different reason than I used to. My language was so foul before I started to follow Jesus that I actually made a lady quit her job because I cursed so much. Not really proud of that one, but I wish she’d had the guts to tell me to my face. It might have led to an authentic discussion, instead it just pissed me off towards Christians.
Anyway, when I started following Jesus…I noticed a big change in my language. I didn’t stop cussing, but the tenor and regularity definitely took a hit.
Now I still do once in a while, but usually in situations similar to the one you described.
guess i should have known this would “raise a stink” as we say in the bible belt. i was not offended, btw. i’m still trying to figure out my opinion on cussing. i, too, let out the occasional cuss word. and sometimes donkey butt just doesn’t carry the needed weight to describe a person whose actions are, well, you know…donkey butt-ish. he-he! i try not to. i’ve been trying to speak life over situations, but sometimes that conflicts with the inner turmoil i’m going through. truth be told, i’ve cussed more around GOD than anyone else. part of keeping it real with him, i guess? i’ve just been going thru some really difficult times, and to deny what’s in my heart is not ok with me. he’s helped me do it less often. i guess i think it’s best not to cuss, but i also understand we’re all works in progress, and we do tend to repeat what we hear, and cussing is definitely common. ??? i know i’m all over the place on this. but like i said…still trying to figure it out.
I do… not like a sailor… but, yes, I cuss sometimes.
.-= Matt?s last blog ..A Missionary’s Life: Dancing Queen =-.
Yes, I cuss on occasion. Like when I’m so frustrated and can’t think of anything else. We’re human for goodness sakes.
I think it’s a little overboard for someone to be offended.
I also Love the Lord and know he forgives us when we fail. Like in those moments of cussing and frustration! :)
Merry Christmas!
Have I cussed before? yep. I have to really mad though and feel guilty instantly. //Do I find it wrong? Yep. I want to be as far away from the world as I can be, not right on the line. And one of the few things that sets us apart from the world, at least on the outside, is the words we decide to use. Just my thoughts and I’m still definitely a work in progress…
.-= jackalopekid?s last blog ..come get some free stuff =-.
I do. Not regularly. I work for a Christian organization – so not a lot of it flowing around. Crap was something I broke when my daughter was 2. We were pulling out of the driveway when I noticed our garbage can had been tipped and ‘trashed” by a neighborhood pooch. I was late for work and started my sentence…. “Oh MAN!!!….” to which my two year old said, “where did all that crap come from?”
Blech.
But I do “cuss.” Freakin’ and crap are regulars. But others make an appearance. And I think Jesus still loves me.
If people spent less time judging and being offended and more time focusing on their own hearts, we’d all be in pretty good shape.
Holy crap.
“…think Jesus still loves me.”
Don’t think, Know, that He does!! Passionately, intimately.
Sometimes I say “Oh dear God, help us now!!!!” when I feel frustrated to the max. But, I say it like “God if you don’t help in this situation now,”……hmmm I might want to cuss and be angry at Him (God); but since I say it sternly (“Oh dear God, help us now!!!!”) my mouth shuts up to a meek and quiet spirit. But……confession is good because we are all human. To each his/her own. When I see a movie where they swear every other word; now there’s no excuse for that. Anne, you are so loving letting us explain. thx.
.-= Carol?s last blog ..Christmas Cards!!!! =-.
Excellent comments/discussion here. Nice job stirring this up, Anne. I wondered, though, when I read the title what these comments would look like. So far, everyone’s been fairly nice.
To the question, I’m definitely a non-cusser (despite my comment toward the top). Like Anne and others, I think it was how I was raised: pastor’s family. I remember getting in huge trouble when I was really young because I said “stupid,” and it wasn’t even directed at anyone in a nasty way. (To be fair to my parents, I knew I wasn’t allowed to say it, so it was a clear act of rebellion on my part – I deserved to get in trouble.)
I (and my parents actually) have since loosened up a lot. Still, it comes down to serving others. If someone else struggles with a word, then it’s our obligation avoid helping them stumble.
It’s a tricky issue though. I remember back in ’92 when my family moved from California to Kentucky to start a church. At the time in California, “suck” had already moved out of being a dirty word into being generally accepted by everyone. In Kentucky, though, the word still had sexual connotations attached to it. You can imagine that issues that brought up.
All that to say, yeah, words matter. I try to do what I can to serve others by what I say. And because I grew up in the family I did, I don’t tend to blow up with cuss words. (Still, as some have said already, I get just as angry as anyone so the thoughts are there.)
-Marshall Jones Jr.
.-= bondChristian?s last blog ..Smooth broadcast: How (and why) to promote pointless talking =-.
My last therapist turfed me for saying ‘fuck.’ She said I was abused. I thought she was abusive for yelling at me so I said ‘fuck, will you stop’.
I say wtf? in my head when things are really bad.
Yeah I call ppl names if I am under alot of stress at the time and I percieve someone to be cruel like ‘you are a bitch-a-cholic.’
.-= Lisa?s last blog ..Anatomy Of Cat vs. Field Mouse… =-.
I don’t see what’s offensive about the word “cuss.” Really. What about “butt?”
I don’t, um … use foul language, because Jesus said that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks and I’m trying to root out anything foul from my heart. And because Proverbs says that death and life are in the power of the tongue, and I try to speak life instead of death.
Do I get really irritated at people who can’t drive in the snow even though this is Chicago and it snows every year and they’re clearly in their 40’s and should know by now, and occasionally let one slip? You betcha.
.-= Lex?s last blog ..Pics of the cutest little angels =-.
The seven are off limits.
I say that but I am reminded of the time when God was dealing with sin in my life and threw me out into the wilderness for about a year.
It sucked because God felt far from me.
It sucked because I knew He had to do this in order for me to be with Him.
Every single time I talk about that time where it felt like I was not with him, I want to cuss over and over.
Right now, I want to lace every other word with a cuss word.
I can’t stand being apart from Him. If He has to do that again, I rather He take my life because I don’t want to live here on earth without Him.
Because if f*’in sucked.
.-= Joseph Louthan?s last blog ..Warm Pancetta, Goat Cheese and Spinach Salad =-.
Some make an interesting argument about Phil. 3:8 when Paul uses the word “skubala.” Though translated various ways, the argument goes that the actual word is considered vulgar (along the lines of “sh*t”) and Paul would not have used it in mixed company without expecting a reaction. I don’t feel qualified to do this one justice, but I thought I’d mention it. So…any thoughts? Does this mean there is “cussing” in the Bible?
Yes, but I am selective as to who hears me. In other words…I don’t cuss like a sailor and I don’t cuss in front of my mom or kids. But I will let one fly around my small group (who know my character) or around my outcast friends (who I also drink beer with every now and then) and who also know my heart.
i’m becoming more and more relaxed in my word-choices lately. i knew something changed in that respect when i said, “a**” in discussing something with my mom earlier today. oops.
.-= Crystal Renaud?s last blog ..2010? 20-10? 10? =-.
Yes, I do cuss.
In my late teens and twenties, I had a really vile mouth (though even then, like now, I censored it among little kids and those who might be offended.) I was already a Christian, but I was definitely a struggling, shallow one (as indicated by my life choices and heart…not just the mouth.)
After our pastor preached on what “taking the Lord’s name in vain” included (which was a lot more than I had really thought), I made an intentional effort to clean it up. It was hard work. I have discovered that most of the swear words go away over time, if unused. For me, the F bomb seems to be permanent, though; I almost never SAY it, but it’s the first response inside my head in stressful/angering situations.
I work in youth ministry, with extremely at-risk teens. I generally don’t swear around them; I am not offended when they swear around me (though I do call them, nicely, on taking God’s name in vain.) And they DO swear around me!
Some of the kids stay in touch with me even after they aren’t teens anymore. What fascinates me: the most potty-mouthed guys, who use even the dreaded “c” word (which I detest), who can’t say a sentence without a swear word….almost fall out of their chairs if one small profanity slips out of my mouth when I’m speaking passionately about something. It derails the conversation; they are too busy saying, “I f*ing can’t believe you just cussed!!!”
I cuss from old habit. I cuss from emotion. I cuss because sometimes it’s the most real response I can offer. But I do try to keep it in context.
.-= karen swank?s last blog ..on love and sacrifice: radical rings =-.
For me, cussing (known in my neck of the woods as “swearing”, which is interesting, don’t you think? What does it mean to “swear” as opposed to “curse”… “cuss”, I’m guessing comes from “curse”?)… anyway, for me, cussing brings back difficult childhood memories. To hear the words often feels like a violation.
Okay, so the fact that I sometimes say delicate cuss words now (is there such a thing as a cuss spectrum?) is actually a sign of healing. It means that the past isn’t wielding as much power of my emotional life anymore.
Still, it makes me realize that others might have similar feelings. So I’d not be one to cuss without knowing my audience. :)
.-= L.L. Barkat?s last blog ..Twitter Smile =-.
um, *over* my emotional life anymore [insert gentle editor cuss word here]
.-= L.L. Barkat?s last blog ..Twitter Smile =-.
i’m just curious about where all the folks who were offended are. if they are offended enough to *judge you* then they should have enough courage to post.
“only a fool despises correction,” so if someone approached you and said: “i don’t think it serves our ministry to curse,” that would be one thing. but this blog is essentially ABOUT being a different kind of Christian? yes? which is what we should all be. we shouldn’t strive to be christians – living like pharisees. we should try to be disciples.
Mat 23:25-27 comes to mind:
“How terrible it will be for you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! You are so careful to clean the outside of the cup and the dish, but inside you are filthy-full of greed and self-indulgence! Blind Pharisees! First wash the inside of the cup, and then the outside will become clean, too. “How terrible it will be for you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs-beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead people’s bones and all sorts of impurity.
and that’s all i have to say about this shit!
.-= bloominglater?s last blog ..Give Your Life the Middle Finger =-.
I started laughing so hard that I wheezed at the last line.
I guess the reason I don’t cuss is that I’m trying to get control over stuff. Cussing usually comes accidentally or as a knee-jerk reaction. Those are the moments I want to control–or I want God to control. It’s like wanting to keep myself from buying little stuff in the checkout line or slowing eating enough calories for a meal in the chips they bring to the table at the Mexican restaurant. It’s the stuff I do naturally, on auto-pilot, that I’m committed to getting a hold of.
I honestly side more with people who are intentional in their use of cuss words than I do with people who “can’t seem to stop using them.”
Just to clarify, I am not at all, in any way whatsoever, offended that you said the word cuss. I like vulnerability.
.-= Jennifer Gerhardt?s last blog .."All novels are sequels; influence is bliss." =-.
Yep.
I grew up with my mom not wanting me to say “sucks” or “crap” for a long time, but now even she will call someone a douchebag (which is one of my favorite insults). I will once in a while say something mild in front of her, but only in an amusing or quoting situation. I don’t cuss in front of most of my family or my church friends, unless I know they won’t get offended. Sometimes I wonder what God really thinks of it, and then I realize that I’d rather have this as a vice than be a hyper-religious jerk like about 85% of the people at my church (which is a cautious estimate).
Honestly, I think douchebag is more disgusting…
For some reason, I can use other words without thinking specifically of their literal meanings but that one is married in my mind to it’s physical counterpart and thus CREEPS ME OUT.
(And no, I’m not trying to be an ass/jerk/twinkletoes or what have you. Just giving my reason for not liking that particular phrase.)
I try to avoid cussing, but sometimes I’m so angry that nothing else seems to express what I’m feeling as well as foul language. A chain of profanities can provide a cathartic moment, but after I finish, I generally feel guilty because later it seems like cussing was unnecessary. I especially feel guilty when I use nasty words in front of my children which I REALLY try to avoid.
Also, I think that if I use cuss words it is a reflection on my ever-shrinking vocabulary, that I can’t come up with better words to express what I’m trying to describe, be it pain or anger or whatever.
Clearly, I’m the kind of girl who cusses when she’s really pissed off, not so much in ordinary conversation.
I’d like to tame my tongue. Maybe it will be a new goal? Thanks for bringing this up!
.-= Hillary?s last blog ..Gingersnap Ice Cream =-.
I cuss when I am mad. Jesus still loves me. I say real cuss words to make my point. I don’t use fake ones, that’s simply stupid! like friggin is tricking God and your heart. IF you say friggin, you might as well say the other word. Simply put, cussing can make a story funnier.
I used to cuss like a sailor (when I was teenager) to impress my friends. Now, my language has cleaned up alot. Although, I’ve gotta admit I’ve let one slip out when I’m angry or hurt myself. Thank God for His grace.
BTW- Have you ever wondered who invented these words anyway? Like, who decided they would be bad words.
You’re damn right, I cuss.
But I usually try not to. I feel they are just expressive words that do a better job of getting an idea or feeling across. We have added this stigma of being “wrong” ourselves. However, because of the damage it can do to our witness as Christians, I feel we should be very careful with how we use them. ‘At’s all.
1. I hate cussing, so no, I never cuss.
2. I also cuss sometimes, so I kinda hate myself when I do.
3. I also hate hypocrites. And liars. They make me want to cuss. So I do.
On a completely different subject, did you see the online discussion a few months ago from the woman who was quite surprised to learn that “frigging” was probably not a good word for an upstanding Christian woman to liberally pepper her public speeches with?
.-= Jeff?s last blog ..How to make friends and be influenced by the right people =-.
occasionally…for seasoning. in Phil., the Apostle Paul used the word “rubbish” or “dung”. In Greek, this was one of the strongest words he could have used. The equivalent of Sh*t. I’m thinking the sin is not in the word but the usage and intent
Yes. And I do so emphatically, albiet appropriately. I don’t dig gratuitous swearing, but sometimes a girl really needs to get her point across…and fiddlesticks ain’t cuttin’ it.
oh fiddlesticks! haha… I’m with you.
.-= Graham?s last blog ..Upside Down Christmas =-.
Yup… I “cuss”. I don’t cuss AT people… but I do cuss randomly. I really don’t think it’s a big deal. IMHO
.-= Graham?s last blog ..Upside Down Christmas =-.
i used to be a prolific cusser…i grew up in a home (dad is a lumberjack) so by the time i was 9 years old i could cuss like a grown man…i still might cuss under the breath every once in awhile…
.-= Jim Gray?s last blog ..God of Second Chances =-.
Great question.
There are good points on both sides of this argument. I used to cuss compulsively like a sailor. I couldn’t help it. Then, I measured my religiousness by how much I didn’t say the F-word.
Now, I’m somewhere in the middle, but no longer have the compulsion to do it or not do it. I have a deeper appreciation for words and think that, at times, the words “damn,” “hell” (and some others) are appropriate. I think that the thing is whether or not you can control, whether you feel like you have to do it. Just my two cents.
.-= Jeff Goins?s last blog ..How God Speaks Directly to Us =-.
One thing I never do and that is to ask God to damn anything. Because God’s love is absolute, He has not and never will damn anyone. God is not tempted with evil nor does He tempt anyone with evil (James 1:13). In this world where right seems wrong and wrong seems right, the steadfastness of God’s promises beckon us to His Secret Place.
.-= patriciazell?s last blog ..#23 UNDERSTANDING CHRIST: HIS WALK ON EARTH =-.
I think people need to get over it. If you are offended by the word “cuss”, then I find you stupid. People that write stupid things like that makes me want to cuss!
And I do cuss. I do not have a mouth of a sailor but I honestly don’t go a day without cussing. Not something I’m proud of, but it is what it is and I don’t have a desire to change. I personally do not think cussing is a big deal at all.
You bet. Who doesn’t? And if people don’t cuss verbally, they certainly do mentally.
Like someone said above, people are looking for things to get upset about.
You? You go on with your BAD ASS self!
:)
.-= Justin Wise?s last blog ..The Death Rattle of Blockbuster =-.
Only when I’m passionate, damnit.
What?
I’d like to say I never cuss because we shouldn’t let “anything unwholesome come from our mouths”…but, I can’t.
Like I said, only when I’m passionate.
Which is like every…other…day.
*sigh*
.-= Cindy Beall?s last blog ..Fave Post ? I Could Stay Awake All Night Just To Hear You Breathing =-.
And another thought…
When someone says “dangit” or “Shoot” or “freakin” aren’t they really just using those slang words for “dam***” or “sh*t” or “f*****”?
After all, “freakin” is the Christian “f” word.
We choose the slang words because it sounds better but the intent, well, it’s still in our hearts. God sees our hearts.
Now, I don’t cuss like a sailor or anything and actually don’t like to be around people who do it all the time. But, a little a** and dam*** every so often never hurt nobody.
Just sayin’.
.-= Cindy Beall?s last blog ..Fave Post ? I Could Stay Awake All Night Just To Hear You Breathing =-.
Cuss is not a bad word!! I stick my head back into the Christians sub-culture at times and I am shocked by how prudish people can be. Bad words fly out of my mouth and I’m no worse for it. I try to get my kids to think about what the words mean and then they don’t want to say it. (They’re grossed out.) I was raised to not take God’s name in vain, but the occasional ‘bad’ word is necessary and helps one let off steam. Or not, and that’s your choice too.
.-= Melody Hanson?s last blog ..For Everything there is a Season =-.
Only AS NEEDED and FOR EFFECT. :)
.-= Lindsey Nobles?s last blog ..Fa La La La La =-.
I grew up hearing people (my parents and their friends) cuss from a very early age. It is a normal part of my expression although at times, I cuss too much. So I try to contain it. Cuss words don’t slip out during my sermons, at least they haven’t yet…….
ooh Anne…… your book looks interesting, I think I’ll pick up a copy…. There are times in dealing with totally unreasonable people that I’m afraid I’m going to lose it and tell them what is really is…. ;)
I do. And sometimes I’m a-okay with it and sometimes I’m not.
My dad’s a youth pastor and he always used to say “Do I think Jesus would be okay with cussing? HELL NO!”
I think it comes down to the spirit of the law and not the letter.
.-= T.J.?s last blog ..Review: Run Fatboy Run =-.
I do. And sometimes I’m a-okay with it and sometimes I’m not.
My dad’s a youth pastor and he always used to say “Do I think Jesus would be okay with cussing? HELL NO!”
I think it comes down to the spirit of the law and not the letter.
.-= T.J.?s last blog ..Review: I and Love and You =-.
alllll the time, mostly at work, where all the crazy $|-|17 happens
If context is king, is it cussing when uttered in the bedroom between husband & wife?
Does the following have any relevance?
3But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. 4Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.
I believe that cussing is a sign of poor vocabulary. The person who cusses just can’t find a better word to express themselves. They are ignorant. I grew up with a father who cussed as part of his vocabulary, but now, at age 60, hearing cusswords just grates on my nerves. It is jarring to hear it. Not edifying for me or them.
If cussing is wrong based on your heart, than so are slang words and other “cute” replacement words.
I cuss. Not profanely. My choice words are intentionally (sans when I stub my toe or the like) used to emphasize or clarify… And it’s not because I have a poor vocabulary, either. Thank you very much.
Preach. :)
.-= Anne Jackson?s last blog ..Unleash =-.
I concur.
Um…Yes. I do. Kind of alot.
Once, at church, the pastor said something about bad language being a mark of the ignorant. And like three rows of heads turned and looked at me. All I could do was shrug my shoulders.
These days, I get email from people saying things like “refreshing”, “honest”, “transparent”, and “real” in relation to the words I choose to write on my stupid blog, and have received several notes from that very pastor saying the same. It’s kind of nice to be appreciated…dirty mouth and all. :)
Cussing becomes a mark of ignorance when the mouth it’s coming from lacks discretion, i.e. cussing at/around children, or in an abusive manner, or when it is culturally offensive to do so. Other than that, I say it’s fair game.
.-= Jamie, the Very Worst Missionary?s last blog ..Me and my bitches; An object lesson in Worship =-.
Wow….interesting thread. Sorry that I’m late getting in on it.
My parents cussed in my presence (though they never dropped the f-bomb) and learned so many “colorful metaphors” that by the time I was 12, I could use them all. Of course, I began to hang around peers who used worse language and picked those up. Then, I dropped an f-bomb in biology class! OOPS!! After I got saved at 16, I tried to clean up my language but it took awhile and let a few slip.
Gradually, my language got cleaner and I even tried to eliminate “substitute” words, though that’s still a work in progress. With my wife, I may use an occasional cuss word to make a point, but I normally don’t cuss and strongly encourage my daughter to not even use substitute words. (The ironic this is, though, that my wife continues to use “jackass” as if it’s a normal word. Perhaps it’s from her Southern culture…)
I think Christians should live to a higher standard because we are children of The King, not because we’re holier-than-thou or better than anyone else. It took me awhile to stop being offended by unbelievers who cuss but I’ve come to that point because they’re acting according to their nature. Christians, on the other hand, have a new nature–the nature of Jesus–living in them. I want to elevate my speech above the common, vulgarities because the Bible says,”…among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person?such a man is an idolater?has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.” Because of that portion of Scripture, I don’t believe Christians should cuss.
Now, that being said, it’s next to impossible to even circulate among society anymore without hearing cuss words flung all over the place as everyday speech. We’re told our daughter–who is 11–that she is going to hear bad words and she’s welcome to ask us–in private–about any word she hears and/or sees (like on a T-shirt). We’ll tell her what the word means, why it’s vulgar, and admonish her not to use that word. I’m sure, though, that the time is coming when she’s going to test us by saying shit, fuck, or some other obscenity. We’ll have the soap ready…. :^)
BTW, I guess it was the way I was raised or the era in which I grew up but I still find it sickening when a woman of any age cusses. It brings to me the image of excrement coming out of her mouth. Remember, I’m 47 and the American culture was different–and, perhaps cleaner–then.
I didn’t cuss in 12 years of Christian school.
I didn’t cuss (much that I recall if ever as a habit) in 5 years of totally secular art school.
Then I started teaching in public school…
I picked up words from the kids. I picked up words from the colleagues.
Its hard to know the morality of this. Sometimes I think, “This is not a good witness”. Other times I think, “Saying, ‘holy Christmas’ or ‘good freakin’ night’ is not a better witness”. I know we’re supposed to be fools for Christ but do we have to be airheads?
Sometimes the word fits… sometimes it doesn’t. Even non-believers talk about excessive or “gratuitous” cussing. They know. Yes, our bar should be higher but where exactly that bar belongs I’m not sure I really know.
Jesus hung out with sailors. (Literally.) I’m sure Peter had the fisherman’s mouth.
(But then was it he who called himself the “man of unclean lips”? (I know Isaiah did.))
I wonder how Peter was during Jesus’s ministry. I wonder how he was 20 years later when he started pastoring churches.
Good question. I wish I knew how to resolve it. But eventually I’m sure the Holy Spirit will tell me. For now he’s working on gossip…