I’m happily in isolation on an island that can only be reached by seaplane or ferry. During this week away, I’ve asked several friends to fill in for me this week. Hopefully you’ll meet some new voices of people I admire.
Today’s post comes from Graham Brenna. I met Graham when I spoke at a church in Chicago. He’s a very passionate and encouraging person. And he is really tall.
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Dealing with Change
Change is inevitable.
People change, jobs change, relationships change, toothbrushes change, for better or for worse, things change. It?s how we deal with those changes that will make or break us.
Take the all too familiar interview question, where do you see yourself in five years?
What would happen if we jumped ahead five years overnight? That would be a massive change! We wouldn?t handle it very well because we would not be prepared for it. We go through little changes in our lives daily and handle them with ease, however, big changes are inevitable, even some we might not be ready for.
For the sake of not drawing this out into a twenty-page post I?ve narrowed how we react to changes into two groups; kicking and screaming and acceptance.
Kicking and Screaming
For many of us, our initial reaction to a last minute change is to fight it. We like to stick with the plan. When things don?t go as planned we get angry and our nostrils flare. We are quick to find the faults in others that led to this unforeseen misdirection and cast blame. The truth is that throwing blame around in the middle of a change is a dangerous game. It?s best to keep a level head and go with the flow. You don?t want to be seen kicking and screaming? it?s not flattering? usually your hair gets messed up and there is the possibility of rug-burns.
Acceptance
Some changes are easier to accept than others. When something is planned out before implementation it is easier to go along with. However, when a last minute change occurs. I?ve found that acceptance is a safer way to respond than by kicking and screaming. Accepting a last minute change can be frustrating sometimes however it?s best to revisit the situation later to debrief instead of putting up barriers.
These last minute changes shouldn?t be looked at as bad things. They should be embraced as learning opportunities. I?ve been trying to form a new habit lately. When things don?t go as planned, I write down what the situation was and what caused it to go awry. Then I try and figure out what I could have done to prevent it. Doing this usually takes all of five minutes. Actually writing it down and doing my own debrief of the situation has given me clarity and has helped to prevent unwanted changes in the future.
How do you deal with change? How can we help each other deal with change in a more grace-giving manner?
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Comments
6 responses to “Dealing with Change”
Graham, thanks so much for this post. I work with the staff in insurance agencies every day concerning this issue. I love the part about your hair being messed up with the kicking and screaming. I will be sharing this with a lot of people.
Thanks, Graham. Oh, I don’t do well with last minute changes at all. I like to prepare for change and get comfortable with the idea of it. But, that’s the kicker with life. They are usually, most often, not planned. Welcome in, Grace.
Man, my whole life is about acclimating to change. And living in the “in between” sure is hard. I find that rooting yourself in something other than your current location, job, house etc is foundational to being able to go with any new changes much more easily than otherwise. For me, my roots start with my husband and kids and then burrow down deep into the heart of the Father. It’s the only way I know.
I think I am dealing with change a whole lot better these days. Just trying to work on the kicking and screaming that comes with how my daughters react to change. Ugh.
Thanks you guys for the positive responses! I wasn’t sure how this post would do… I was thinking that it was something people have heard over and over again. When I write… I’m usually inspired by something that happened in my life recently and how I reacted to it. Basically… I kicked and screamed. My hair got messed up. It takes me about 3-4 minutes to get my hair just right in the morning… so that was a big deal. This post was kinda my reflection on that.
Hi everyone and Graham, that was a great help for most of people. Changes is the only thing in this world that is permanent. And I am very thankful with God that He gave me a brave heart to face changes, maybe because of my faith on him. And I believe that everything is working on together for the good of those who have faith in him.