that was one of the questions david kuo asked at our dinner with leadership development students while we were in uganda. a man who is ugandan, a father, a pastor, and leader answered without hesitation,
“uganda.”
some of us seemed a little shocked. america. it’s the land of opportunity. it’s safe. you can get medical attention. at least three meals a day.
“exactly,” the man said. “you know where your next meal is coming from. you have jobs. paychecks. in uganda, you may not know where your next meal comes from. you have no money. you have nothing to depend upon but God. and i would rather have my children rely on God more than i would want them to be distracted by everything else.”
i have been contemplating the things upon which i have dependence. my job? absolutely. my paycheck? yes. my car. what’s in my fridge. other people.
when one of those things gets murky or muddy or falls apart, it’s easy for me to fall apart, too. i am distracted by them, sometimes (and probably more frequently than i’d care to admit) more often than not.
where does my help come from?
i am distracted from dependence on god.
in a culture of over-abundance and luxury, how can we remedy this?
(ps – if you want to look at some of the most beautiful children in uganda, click here.)
Comments
45 responses to ““would you rather your children grow up in uganda or america?””
great stuff anne!
it’s so easy to get caught up with the “things” we “need” in life…we miss the fact that Christ is all we need.
Uganda may be poor in amenities, but rich in the Lord! It is what the eyes can’t see in pictures. The presence of the Lord truly is worth more than all the riches of the world. I want my girls to hunger and thirst for God alone!
Thanks for stirring my heart!
Good post. Thanks.
Yeah, this kind of questions haunts me more each day. What is the greatest thing I can give my kids…leave with them for this short life that will make the right difference?
mark 10:21 – Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”
We like to chalk this up as Jesus trying to see if this guy was willing. I am pretty sure it is much more straight forward than that. I am just realizing I am a “fat camel,” and I justify it by saying that I am just providing for and protecting my children/family. But that was never my job, God can handle that pretty well! I hope my faith catches up to my knowledge…I believe it will!
I’ve been reading your blog for a while, and have enjoyed how you have chronicled your trip and your writing process and the general open spirit you bring to your writing and this blog.
This post compelled me to comment because I get really annoyed when people in a position of privilege say they’d rather live in a Third World country with minimal resources as a way to connect to God or what’s real.
It is natural to feel overwhelmed and a bit guilty by the abundance and excess we have in this country. But doh’t assuage those feelings by idolizing the conditions of those who have less. People in Uganda aren’t poor in “amenities” they are poor in RESOURCES – big difference!
If you want to live a simple life where your reliance is on God – do it. Do it where you are!
I’m teaching about this very thing on Saturday in NYC–about the importance of helping our kids engage in culture, yet stay pure. I’m rallying a bit about moving away from parenting as protectionism.
My children’s assumption of what is “due” them is my biggest struggle as their mom. I grew up in India (as a missionary kid) and you never knew where the money was going to come from one month to the next…and we had it MUCH better than the nationals.
I hope to take them to India in the next 2-3 years and give them some insight to reality.
“in a culture of over-abundance and luxury, how can we remedy this?”
I was talking with a friend awhile back about a “megachurch” she visited. She noted that she never heard the name of Jesus during the entire service.
I thought about how a megachurch (not trying to start a megachurch discussion here – just sharing a thought I had…) doesn’t necessarily *need* the presence of the Holy Spirit each week – because they have cool lights and a great band. They can still pull off a great event – with or without God.
In a place like Uganda, without the Holy Spirit there wouldn’t be a church service. There’s no back up plan. No neat video. They’ve come to worship God. Period.
We’re like that here in America. We’re “MegaChristians”. We can “get by” without the Holy Spirit.
I, personally, want to ask God for things that will make me look foolish.
Yes, God can provide food for those who are hungry and shelter for those who are cold…
But I want to also believe – really believe – and daily live like I believe – that God can heal broken bodies, restore marriages, transform lives.
We (or at least *I*) talk about more than I do it.
I want to follow God to places only He can lead and pray for things only He can accomplish.
We can depend on God for provision and we can depend on Him for power. Here in America we have the provision, but we’re not asking for anything more.
This is a good post, but I agree with Tam. It frustrates me when people make these types of statements.
If you want your children to depend on God instead of humankind for their needs, you (the parent) need to model that behavior yourself instead of making statements that place the blame on the place we live instead of holding ourselves accountable for how we live our lives here in the states.
I know what that pastor is saying.
But let me say this:
You don’t have to live in a 3rd world country to be dependent on God.
He says that you would have no choice but to depend on God.
I as an American have two choices to make. On one hand, I can get through this life on my own talents, strengths and beliefs. I will make it. So many people do it all the dang time.
Or.
On the other hand, I will choose to serve and love God. Instead of letting myself do for myself, I will choose to let God provide me. Just for today. If I make it bed tonight and if I wake up, tomorrow morning I will do it all over again.
You don’t have to be in the middle of nowhere to be in the presence of the Most High. In the chaos and confusion of this life that most people choose to go at it with the pedal to the metal, listen to the voice of God, be still and know that He is God.
That little girl who gave her life to God in Uganda or me driving through traffic on 635 in Dallas: we are both children of God and we both bowed our hearts and knees to Him. We both serve Him on this day and we both depend on Him for everything and everything.
I should state the man in the story is Ugandan. :)
i don’t have a great answer.
but…i know that the week i spent in india last summer did an amazing job of defining reality for me.
i also saw that pure, lasting, internal, soul-feeding joy comes IN NO WAY from material things.
tam’s comment sparked a thought:
in places like india, uganda and others where there is often little provision, we need to make sure we are not confusing the lack of luxuries/conveniences with a lack of essentials for survival and health.
the former is not important…the latter is, and it would be contrary to the character of God to suggest otherwise (i do not think you are suggesting that, anne :)).
great point john…convenience versus basic provision…good contrast.
In developed countries, one does have to admit how “easy” it is to think we can rely on ourselves vs. God. How there is a tendency to coast through life from time to time, before we “wake up” or have a “life moment” and we need God – on our terms –now. How sad and unfortunate it is to live life this way.
I remember reading not long ago reading that there’s a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses… As in all countries, there are individuals who are interested, and there are individuals who are committed.
Where am I today? Well, I am committed!
our kids are greatly blessed to be born and raised in the good ol usa – no guilt here at all.
the challenge is not dealing/overcoming guilt, but how to be good stewards of the assets/conveniences God gave us to steward.
example – anne has a pretty popular blog and sometimes she talks about her blessing (like the book, etc) – no problem with that at all
howver, anne had a life changing experience in uganda. did she forget it and go to neiman’s to celebrate being home (don’t know) – but i do know that she used two of her assets for God’s glory!
First, her book, which draws interest and bloggers creates an audience for her and for God’s will.
Second, she used the blog to educate and promote sponsorships for uganda children. this, to me, is a perfect example of being blessed (the book, the computer, the marketing savvy, the blog) and leveraging this asset for the Kingdom by using this media to educate and find sponsors
in other words – good job God, good job Anne, and thanks for practicing what you preach (bad word i know), let’s try “practice what you challenge others to do”
we can al do the same with our money, toys, dreams, assets, gifts and talents – but are we really doin it?
I have struggled with this a lot and have finally come to a resolution. While Uganda is swept in poverty, their faith is strengthened. At the same time, our biggest loss in America is religious pluralism. While my kids have food and clothes, they are also subjected to many “truths”, leaving their faith into the hands of chaos, unless I manage to steer them in the right direction.
At the end of the day, God knew what He was doing. He put Anne Jackson in America, gave her a job, and sent her to Uganda on a mission trip. He did this with purpose.
He placed me in the middle of utter chaos, shaped by drugs and alcohol, only to find myself serving at a local church.
This is kin to the youth camp/retreat experience. How many of us have been there? Our lives are dragging spiritual, we go off to camp and get all fired up, come back and look at the church/culture around us and wonder what their problem is, then in a few days/weeks/months we’re just as spiritually depressed as we were before going to camp.
We often fail to realize that we can have the camp experience everyday. For a long time I thought it was necessary to unplug so I wouldn’t be influenced by all the outside stuff. Eventually I realized that the real key to the camp experience is that you’ve been focusing on Jesus nearly 24/7. What’s to stop me from doing that now?
Nothing. And as far as my kids are concerned, if I’m putting Jesus first and striving for the 24/7 relationship, they see that and it will naturally rub off. If my relationship has changed me were He is more important than my stuff, my kids and others around me will see it.
Who knows, if I raise my kids right and keep them from falling into the materialism trap like I did early in my life (I blogged about this very thing today), then when they grow up they will have extra resources available to them to help sponsor children around the world since they won’t have an overwhelming debt load.
Tough. I know that we’re ordained to be in this country at this time for this generation. I want my kids to understand that God placed them here with purpose and we will honor that with how we live and minister. With it comes great responsibility to manage what we have and not worship it. Good thoughts.
Tough question… I’ve enjoyed reading everyone’s comments so far. For me this is a condition of my heart… you could transplant me to a third world country and in my independent, selfish, stubborn nature I would find (or at least try to find) a way to survive. It might not be as comfortable as it is here in the U.S. but I don’t think I would rely on God until my heart has been softened toward Him. It’s the same here. I get by with a comfortable existence but it’s only in those moments when my heart is softened to His that I find a peace and satisfaction with life.
how can we remedy this?
we remember that none of the other stuff we rely on is guaranteed. friends leave. the economy takes a turn for the worse. cars break down. and even when things are good, these things don’t really satisfy. i have friends/family/spouse; i’m still lonely. i have a good job; it’s not really what i was created to do. i have stuff; it’s just stuff, and i get bored with it.
we remedy the distraction of stuff by not believing the hype. we become really intentional about remembering… nothing i have came from me. it’s all a gift. my help comes from the Lord, the Creator of heaven and earth.
Just stop. Stop overconsuming and start giving. It’s really not that hard.
thats an easy response: america. my wife and i have experienced first hand international adoption and know with out a doubt that this country is the best place on earth to raise a family. america is not perfect but we have the opportunity to provide a life that is not imaginable in other developing countries in the world. from food, to clothing to shelter, to just plain freedom (and on and on) there is absolutely no competition.
Thanks for your comment again! :)
By the way, I’m glad I saw your note about not clicking “Select This Child” unless you do in fact sponsor them because it freezes their profile for a hour! I didn’t even know that, but I’m glad to know now!
Thanks for all you do!!
Really enjoy your blog. found you through a friends blog. This made me think of a conference we just got back from this last weekend. John Piper did a conference at Cal Poly Titled : Don’t waste your life.
Premise: we love the created (stuff/things) More than the creator b/c of this we waste our lives pursuing things & stuff that just don’t matter. Makes you think…
Its funny that you wrote this, because i actually had the exact same thought process the other day as I was thinking about my recent trip to Africa. Good stuff. And i loved watching you and Los on Mogulus tonight. We need to be real friends…not just blog friends. Yes?
WOW! Can I steal this for my blog? I want to post it on Monday, I will give you props for sure! This is powerful!
When I returned from the Brazil after living there for 2 years, my prayer was, “Lord, please don’t let me become apathetic.” I completely understand what the Ugandan gentleman was saying.
Eight years ago God called me to live on skid row. Six years ago, after freaking out and stomping my feet, I said yes. My son is 15 now, we have shared our home with drug addicts, and prostitutes. He is the most compassionate guy I’ve ever met. I throw their stuff out on the lawn and my son goes and brings it back in the house and says,” mom , what would Jesus Do?” My parents and friends freaked out when I shared with them where we were going to live. I definitely didn’t have any prove for them that it would work out but so far so good. Here we are protected from everything of the world. There is no pressures to be like anyone, or fit in, the street is just one big family, no masks, yeah sure there is drugs but if that’s not what tempts you then you are almost temptation free. We totally depend on God its awesome. This guy collects bottles for a living and puts his tithe in our mail box and my son understands that is how God is providing for us. We are so happy, we have everything we need. This laptop I’m using write now is because my son prayed and for Christmas he got TWO.One of them was from the pawn shop owner across the street. He just wanted to give us a Christmas present.Not one day here have we ever not had what we need. What we do have is joy, trust and faith. If i could have given my son anything it would be that He trusts God, and he does. I believe that it is a direct result of us living here. If God is calling you – GO and Go with your kids. It is probably the best thing you could ever do for them. I had so many people try to talk me out of this, and now they come and visit.
We’ve been through some situations in the course of our marriage that have brought us to our knees and showed us to the “I-Can-do-it-myself” attitude that we’d fallen into.
I’ve been feeling some stirrings recently — that I need share more about that. Thank you for the reminder.
Blessings,
Karla
I can understand the Ugandan gentleman’s perspective and reasoning. I have visited Uganda several times over the past ten years. His answer is thought provoking. It obviously provoked thought from many people.
Our attitudes about Africa have been limited to danger, death, and destruction. I have experienced something completely different in Africa. Of course there are serious health, conflict, and safety issues in Uganda and many other parts of the world. That also includes the United States of America.
We are are blessed because we live in the land of opportunity. Many Americans take that for granted. Many Americans have gained a sense of entitlement rather than appreciation for the blessings in their lives.
I have learned many things from my Ugandan friends. Africans tend to be relationship oriented. Americans tend to be task and time oriented. They value each other. We value our stuff. I was taught, “love people and use stuff, do not love stuff and use people.”
We live in a wonderful country full of generous and good-hearted people. But we also live in a country full of apathetic, arrogant, and selfish people. It is up to every parent which way they want to raise their children.
In my opinion, the Ugandan gentleman simply expressed pride and appreciation for his country and the values his parents gave him. Each of us would do the same. There is no right or wrong in the question was was proposed. We need to respect and learn from our differences.
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another”
Proverbs 27:17
I love this post. My husband and I have been discussing this A LOT lately…i am so close to being here. So close and yet far enough I cannot tell you I would be fully comfortable jumping into a situation where I was struggling for our next meal. I wonder sometimes if I rely on God in a box…does that make sense?
So true! I just posted on “stuff”. Too much stuff! And it gets in the way. I know that “stuff” clutters my heart, my life and I’m sure the Lord wonders where I’ve left room for him. It should be, though, I’ve filled my heart and life up with him and he makes room for what I need. Great post!
I found this link on stumble but totally enjoyed it. My future husband and myself have both been to Uganda and want to raise our family there. Something really looked down on by our American society. This artical is encouraging. It’s so true the people over there have next to nothing, but are the happiest most loving people i’ve met. If that’s what happens when you take away comfort you get pure love, then count me and my family in!
If the choice is between Uganda and a major centre in North America, that might be a difficult one for me. Amongst gleaming towers, great sums of money and prosperity, there are folk who meet the description of those in Uganda. There is no paycheque, no income security, no certainty, poor access to good food and often no place to live.
A man in a story asks another man named Jesus, “Who is my neighbour?” Those who know the story know what follows.
Do we merely add our castoffs to the charity pile in hopes that those who experience poverty will enjoy our charity? Do we feed hungry people and send them away knowing we have done a charitable thing? That is thought provoking.
Do we not boldy confront those things in society that force people live in poverty or make them homeless? Besides our own yearnings for comfort, what are those things? What is happening in the work world, the corporate world, the natural world that steals from people the ability to have a secure income? Who are the people responsible for allowing or causing people to lose their livelihoods? Why do they let it or make it happen? What do we say to them? How can we stop them from from doing these things?
This is a very big challenge.
What can we do in our communities, neighbourhoods and churches to set an example so that no one in our midst is in want?
Remember Acts 4:32 “And the congregation of those who believed were of one heart and soul; and not one of them claimed that anything belonging to him was his own, but all things were common property to them.”
Now, isn’t that an answer straight from the scriptures? And, if we can do that, then we have gone a long way towards bringing hope to those whose greatest need is to get rid of most of their stuff.
Live simply so others can simply live.
Very thought provoking! As a mom with 3 girls I see them depending on many things, and I know alot of it is my fault. They see my dependence on everything with a sort of dependence on God.
I’m trying to get better, and I guess that’s a big part of what it is about here, effort to put God first!
Jen
Your complacency to rely on “God” is what makes it so that when the bad times come, when we feel more of this recession. Instead of fixing it we go to churches and pray, that is neither pragmatic nor helpful. You and all that agree that Christ will solve all of our problems are the bane of an advanced society and should be purged accordingly.
i would pick America. I am an atheist although i am not hostile to religion, because i feel that religion serves an important purpose of providing hope to the downtrodden. But it is still only a pacifier. I would choose a good life rather than a false hope to get me through a bad life.
TheGuy wrote: “But it (religion) is still only a pacifier.”
Religion and faith are not pacifiers if they move people to make the world a better place. Religion and faith are motivators to confront abuse of power, promote fairness and justice, to include marginalised people, to ensure everyone has enough to eat and a place to live, to protect the environment (God’s creation), to call on governments to end wars and to bring healing to a hurting world.
Interesting question to ponder. The point is well-taken. It is easier to “forget” about God in a culture of abundance.
Perhaps one remedy is to spend time in service – locally and globally. I hope to get my daughter involved in volunteer and community efforts from a young age. And I also hope to set a good example when it comes to giving generously to the needy and when it comes to being content with simplicity.
I’m so thankful to have God in America! Yes, we have it good here compaired to countries like Uganda, but we really have a great need for God here, too. As for raising children, God Himself said to “suffer the little children to come to me and forbid them not”…He has his hand upon them no matter where they are raised. Praise God!
Religion does not put food on the table. Religion does not provide solid work. Religion does not teach pride in one’s accomplishements; if everything is preordained by an invisible deity, what’s the point of trying to be more than one is born into? Religion is a bane on humanity and creates masses who want little more than to wait for death.
Religion is for suckers.
I’m a sucker.
This is such a great post, thank you for sharing.
Also, I *love* the term “blog extrovert.” That is genius. I will be quoting you on that.
You don’t all by default “have” jobs. You went to school, you applied for a job, you show up every day, you deposit your check. If you believe Christ is going to take care of you then quit them, and live by the grace of your God.
It doesn’t take a trip to Uganda to live this way.