where’s my paparazzi?

this morning, i get an email. it reads:

Ms. Jackson,

I was wondering if you would be interested in having a butler and driver. I can also go-fer and handle administrative matters. If interested please drop me a note.

Thank you,

John

i laugh. a lot. i wonder if movies like 13 going on 30 happen in real life, that really i have become some famously wealthy person and someone actually wants to be my butler, driver, and assistant. i reply:

John,
I would totally love to have your assistance, however, I can barely afford to keep my cats fed and keep my car payments made on time…if
I ever hit the jackpot though, you will be the first person I call.

so, i continue laughing for about half an hour as i unpack. then i think, “wait…maybe i am suddenly rich and famous…” i seriously opened my front door and waited for the camera lights to flash and microphones to be shoved in my just-woke-up-and-have-been-moving-for-three-days face.

i was met by the quietness of an early sunday morning.

John writes me back and realizes that i am not the actress anne jackson, best known for her part in the movie the shining.

bummer.