Anne Marie Miller

Category: Leadership

  • for all of you peons who aren’t the lead pastor

    i’m totally kidding, by the way.? you’re not a peon.

    but most of us aren’t senior pastors.? very few of us who read this blog are the big time decision makers.? most of us are support staff.

    and in such roles, we often face difficult questions.? our culture of subconscious (or conscious) hierarchies, combined with our sincere respect, and in some cases a fear for our job can leave us wondering what to do if we think our lead pastor (or whoever your mega-leadership-boss-man/woman is) is on an unhealthy road.

    boomama asked me this question for last week’s blog blitz, and i think it is a topic seldom addressed, thus my reposting.? even though this is targeted toward assistants, it really applies to anyone who isn’t calling the shots.

    Let?s say someone works as an assistant to a senior pastor / executive pastor / high-up-person-on-the-church-leadership-flowchart. And let?s say that someone who works as an assistant notices that his or her boss is stressed, anxious, tired – basically on the verge of burnout. Do you think there are any specific things that assistant could do for his or her supervisor to lighten the load? Or should the assistant just stay out of it?

    my response:

    To answer your question ? YES. Absolutely YES. How will depend on that person?s relationship with their supervisor and it could take some serious guts?maybe even putting their job on the line in the worst case scenario?.but we have a responsibility to carry each other?s burdens (See Galatians 6).

    A few ways the assistant could do this practically:

    1. Communicate it directly. Set some time up with the supervisor to specifically address this. Don?t throw it in the mix of another meeting. ?The reason I wanted to meet with you today is because I?m concerned.? Explain the behavior you see that is worrying you.

    2. Offer any assistance you can provide. If it?s something obvious like a particular project or area of responsibility, THINK AHEAD. Assistants know better than anyone the details of what?s happening. Make a plan ahead of time of how you can lighten the load and recommend it for the supervisor. Otherwise, you?re giving that person more work trying to figure out what you can do.

    3. Encourage them consistently and appropriately. When I see my own boss getting stressed or overwhelmed, or maybe he indicates he?s had a long day, I shoot him a text message or quick email just to say how honored I am to work with him and that his passion for what he does is contagious. Small gifts for his or her family like a dinner out or offering to babysit so they can have time are both practical ways you can also encourage your boss.

    4. Lead by example. You may be on support staff but people all around you see what you do. Are you contributing to a 24/7 workaholic, always available culture? Or do you have boundaries that you stick by? As an example, I don?t typically check my work email on the weekend. If I do, I won?t respond until Monday unless it?s a legit emergency. This is the culture on our church staff, but it has to be constantly made intentional. Talk freely about the time you spend with your friends or spouse. Leave on time. When you?re sick, stay home. All these things will communicate what is more important?work? Or health?

    5. When all else fails, find someone else to help. It may be another pastor, or an elder, or a leader you know your boss trusts. If it doesn?t seem like your concern is having an impact and your leader is still about to fry, talk to someone else respectfully. Don?t spread rumors or talk about it with everyone?but find one or two key people that you know your supervisor will listen to.

    Don?t EVER think ?I?m just an assistant!? Who cares? You?re a believer! There is no hierarchy when it comes to caring for each other.

    have you ever had to deal with a situation like this? anything you’ve learned along the way?

    because really. caring for each other is the new black.

  • Church Staff Turnover

    Someone left this comment on this post:

    “If you are a pastor and want to know if you are the cause of burnout, look at your turn over rate, how many people have worked for you more than ten years, how many former employees still go to your church? Have you ever reached out to them?

    That kicks you right in the stomach, doesn’t it?

    Staff turnover (and volunteer turnover) in churches is HUGE.? And as pastors and leaders, we should ask ourselves those questions.

    Your thoughts?

  • How to Lead a Tribe (Part 2)

    Thank you guys so much for the great feedback on yesterday’s post.

    This post offers a little bit more simplistic advice…if you’re already leading a tribe, or if you’re going to embark on an intentional journey to do so, this tip is probably one of the most important suggestions i can give you.

    BE YOURSELF – DO IT WELL.

    If being yourself means you have a huge tribe – do it well.

    If being yourself means you have a small tribe – do it well.

    If being yourself means your tribe is loved – do it well.

    If being yourself means your tribe is criticized – do it well.

    If being yourself means your tribe is long lived – do it well.

    If being yourself means your tribe is short lived – do it well.

    If being yourself means your tribe is popular – do it well.

    If being yourself means your tribe is underground – do it well.

    Whatever it costs you, whatever it means to you, whatever it is that’s required of you…be yourself and do it well.

    Your tribe can’t exist without you.

    Be yourself.

    Do it well.

  • How to Lead a Tribe (Part 1)

    First, if you haven’t read Seth Godin‘s latest catalog of wisdom, Tribes, go get it now.

    Today, I thought I’d talk a little bit about tribes – as in a movement of people, not the book.

    One of the most frequently asked questions I get is

    “How can i increase the awareness of _______ (my church, my company, my blog) through social networking? How can i get an online community like yours?”

    Usually I’ll give some general advice anyone can Google about consistency, quality and interaction and end with a polite cyber high-five.

    Go get ’em tiger.

    As I was thinking through it though, I realized maybe not everyone should lead a tribe.

    I’m not saying you have to have everything figured out to do it, nor am i saying that every tribe is built online. But to lead a tribe in the most unclouded of ways, you’ve got to start off on the right foot.

    So, without further adieu, here is the first tidbit of how to lead a tribe:

    Ask yourself if you’re ready.

    How do you know if you’re ready? Try working through these questions to get you started.

    • Do you have a mission to accomplish? Or is your mission to help others propel a cause forward?
    • Do you want to increase your spotlight? Or do you want to increase the spotlight on a specific cause, or group of people?
    • Do you feel you have a lot to contribute? Or are you ready to share ideas and provide a space for others to contribute?
    • Are you wanting to take full responsibility? Or have you realized your responsibility is to inspire and empower a group of people to participate?
    • Are you focused on utilizing your strengths to accomplish a goal? Or are you willing to incorporate the strengths and insight of others?

    Obviously, these questions aren’t fully defined. Neither are the first questions “wrong” and the second questions “right.”

    But the second questions are more tribal in nature, and if you’re only able to answer “yes” to the first questions, you might not be ready to lead a tribe just yet.

    To play off the old adage, there is an “i” in the word “tribes” – Notice the “I” is? right in the middle, surrounded by all the other letters.

    Without the others, the tribe couldn’t be.

    Are you in a position to lead?

  • next year could eat me* for lunch (*or you)

    even though i’m a “J” temperment (highly organized, structured), i am terrible at organizing my own goals.? heck, i am terrible at even setting goals. or boundaries. or any kind of future-planning things.

    as 2008 comes to a close, the year 2009 is stalking me, hiding behind every corner, threatening to attack me with it’s scythe – the crazy schedule, book things, conferences, job stuff, and oh yes, relationships – all demanding time and energy.

    after going through a large stack of brown paper bags, hyperventilating in each one until they were soggy with spit, i decided that now is the ideal time to set some boundaries and goals in place for next year before next year eats me for lunch.

    and thus the five focuses of anne jackson’s 2009 were born.? i’m going to really laser in on these during the first six months, and adjust if i need to.

    i hereby promise to focus on these five things, and these five things alone: (listed in no particular order, and puh-lease, do not be hatin’ saying “you left god off the list.”? god is interwoven through every fiber of my being and is too worthy to be placed on a silly list. thank you.)

    1) my relationship with chris

    2) my job and the people of cross point community church

    3) things directly related to mad church disease and investing in church leaders

    4) specific relationships i feel god leading me to nurture

    5) fighting injustice and poverty by supporting compassion international

    the things outside of these five focuses will get cheated.? but hopefully the things in these five focuses will become rich and valuable.

    i’m learning if you don’t put some intentionality behind your actions, you really will be less effective, less healthy, and way more stressed out.

    how do you process goals and your future? are you a list maker? or fly by the seat of your pants?? how have you seen your style work or not work?

  • an autographed tribes & mad church giveaway

    i went and visited zondervan last week…i may or may not have gotten a few extra advance copies of mad church disease.

    MCD Giveaway

    this contest is easy to win. it goes to the highest bidder.

    (welp, ego…it was nice knowing you!) :-)

    whoever donates the most pairs of shoes to the 50000shoes.com website between 6 am CST tuesday and 6 am CST wednesday wins. and i’ll even autograph it with your favorite bible verse, sprinkle holy water on it, engrave your name in gold, give you a bronze dove plaque, and throw in some snacks from my desk.

    S4S Story

    click here to read more stories of where your shoes are going!

    oh, and here’s the icing on the cake. more truthfully, it’s probably the actual cake. be the highest bidder and not only will you get a hyper-anointed copy of MCD, you’ll also get an autographed copy of seth godin’s newest book, tribes. i know that’s nothing like snacks from my desk, but thought it might sweeten the deal. who knows? maybe he’ll throw in some snacks from his desk.

    Tribes Seth Godin

    comment below (and yep, i’ll need proof if you are the highest donor if you do win!)

    ready…go! how many shoes did you donate today?

  • mystery shoppers in churches

    it was in the wall street journal a couple weeks ago* and it was covered by the tennessean this weekend.

    churches using mystery shoppers. or is it mystery worshippers?

    eh, call it what you will.

    from the tenneesean:

    The person sitting next to you in church today may look like an average visitor, but be careful, he might be taking notes.

    A growing number of churches are using mystery worshippers, consultants giving congregations the same kind of unbiased, unfiltered feedback that secret shoppers give retail stores or restaurants. The mystery worshippers give churches the kind of honest responses that newcomers almost never do. From angry parking lot attendants to boring sermons, they let the churches know what they are doing right and wrong.

    you can read the rest here.

    honestly, i have mixed thoughts on this. fresh eyes are a necessity. what does your sunday gathering communicate? is it consistent with what god has called your unique church to be? or are you missing the mark, but too close to see it?

    on the other hand, is it necessary? if you’re fully relying on what you sense the holy spirit is leading you to do, and trusting he will bring the right people, the right connections all together at the right time, do you need a stranger coming in with critical eyes to tell you the letters on your signage aren’t big enough? i think back to churches in the united states, in europe, and in africa that i have visited – some with all the right signage and people in place but had no sense of community or spirit…and some with what we would call terrible “first impressions” but god was clearly moving with no regard to the out of tune guitar or the uncomfortable seats or stuffy worship center.

    i’m not saying it’s right or wrong – i think this is a potentially subjective matter. but i do think it may be one that could be wrapped up a teensy bit too tightly in a layer of modern consumer mentality if we listen to everything we’re told or feel pressured that we should do.

    jesus was confident in the way he went about his work, and as long as we have the same confidence, no mystery church shopper (or long time member, for that matter) should be needed or able to influence us away from that.

    your thoughts?

    —
    *please note that my boss man was misquoted in the WSJ article — cross point church has never used a mystery shopper.

  • important announcement (1 of 2)!

    the catalyst conference is only a little over a week away and there are many opportunities for you to engage like never before — even if you’re not able to attend!

    Catalyst Backstage

    CATALYST BACKSTAGE

    this year, catalyst is launching something new: CATALYST BACKSTAGE, which will be hosted by none other than yours truly!

    the website’s not up yet (here’s a sneak peek)…but OH MY GOODNESS is this going to be cool – whether you are attending catalyst or even if you aren’t!

    CATALYST BACKSTAGE will feature off-the-cuff, LIVE, exclusive backstage videos with catalyst speakers (and surprise special guests), a completely live, interactive chat open 24/7 so you can chat with other catalyst attendees and discuss what you’re learning during the sessions as they are happening — all in ONE PAGE! we’ll also be pulling in catalyst twitters (#catalyst08 is the hash tag), and other catalyst webby goodness we find throughout the event.

    when i’m not backstage, i’ll be running around with my trusty FLIP video camera invading your personal space, hanging out with you, crashing parties, and showing the world what god is doing through you…these videos will be published on the CATALYST BACKSTAGE site as often as i possibly can so you’ll get to meet other leaders and see what’s going on in their worlds.

    yes…i will be drinking a lot of red bull and no…i probably won’t be sleeping very much but having the opportunity to connect leaders with other leaders both inside and outside of the catalyst arena gets me SO pumped up!!!

    HOW WE NEED YOUR HELP
    in order to connect as many leaders as possible – we are going to need your help!

    next week, i will have a post with sidebar widgets and buttons that will link to the CATALYST BACKSTAGE site and it will take a viral, web 2.0 miracle to spread this as wide and far as possible.

    WHY?

    we realize not everyone can attend catalyst so we want to be able to connect everyone as much as possible via this site through the leaders who are there chatting, through the videos and all the interaction! and we want those who are attending catalyst to be able to connect with each other as well.

    so, feel free to start blogging about this now…and next week we’ll have some widgets for you…but this is so stinking exciting…i couldn’t hold it in anymore!

    tomorrow…stay tuned for another amazing catalyst announcement!

    can we count on your help for spreading the word?!

  • seth godin’s head is going on my fridge

    so you know when you used to get an “A” on your spelling test, your parents would put it up on your family’s fridge, right?

    this is kind of the grown-up-i-love-marketing equivalent of that. mom, my name’s in business week! and i’m printing it off and putting it up on my fridge. along with seth’s head.

    several months ago, business week interviewed me for an article on seth godin, and how his principles and brilliance have been absorbed in many channels — from corporations, to artists, and even to little girl bible bloggers (yours truly).

    anyway, the article arrived today and you can read it here!

    what’s one thing that seth has said that has stuck with you?